Last night I pulled out some of my old books on decorative painting and perused through them. I love to paint and create different finishes. My favorite artist is from England, Annie Sloane. She really gets into the basics and shows many techniques which I have employed on some of the earlier furniture restorations in my career. As I flipped through the pages I noticed how alive I was feeling my heart racing with enthusiasm and I thought about what I had in the studio. What kind of concoctions could I mix together for a finish that would enhance one piece or the other? What could I build or design to merge what I love? And then I thought is this my passion? Is this what floats my boat or gets my mojo going? Yup!
I have decided to fully be a decorative painter. It was a choice I made decades ago even when I ran my flower shop I was a decorative painter. Somehow I lost touch with the wish I had for being a creative artist. I will paint my paintings when the mood allows. It is the study of wall fresco and plasters and woods being cut and paints being applied and creating something from a stick of wood that I find exciting. It is a passion, my passion. I have put my ego to the side and discovered an exciting wonderful truth.
How many of us have these ‘parent tapes’ endlessly playing in our heads or well-meaning people giving advise as they see it? These thoughts and words get caught up in our minds and if you allow them to take hold you start to live so. I know I have struggled with purpose and passion and why am I here for way too long. I am not a person who can just routinely go through life. You all know the type gets up goes to a job they hate comes home and well just exists. I need to know why are things the way they are. I need to keep pushing myself to be better than I was a moment ago. I need to ask questions and I need to figure out my answers. I do not think it matters how old or young you are to ask the questions. I think to say because I am… (fill in the rest) and never bother asking is worst.
Most people would not want my life. Guess what it is not theirs it is mine, all mine, and it is wonderful. Enjoy life, live it with passion every moment you can and keep asking your questions and discovering your truths. It is worth it, I promise.